Genes Can be Such a Cruel Thing
Inherited Imperfections and What to do About it
There’s something quietly unsettling about looking at your parents and seeing the future etched into their features—their gait, their expressions, their flaws, their fragility. Genes can be such a cruel thing, can’t they? They whisper promises of baldness, height (or lack thereof), or even something far more insidious, like temperamental shadows that linger long after childhood.
Few of us can look at our lineage and not feel the pull of inevitability. You either accept it as your lot or spend your life trying to rewrite the story your DNA has already begun telling.
The Mirror That Doesn’t Lie
There’s a moment, often when you least expect it, when you catch a glimpse of yourself—maybe in a mirror, maybe in a photograph—and you freeze. That’s their face staring back at you. Not fully, but unmistakably theirs. Your dad’s crooked nose. Your mom’s tired eyes. A laugh line that feels more like an echo.
But it’s not just the surface that carries their imprint. It’s in the way you snap when things go wrong. Or how your mind drifts toward worry even when there’s nothing pressing to worry about. It's in the silence that sometimes feels too loud, inherited like an heirloom no one wanted but everyone got.
Genes are funny like that. They don’t just give you your eye colour or the shape of your chin. They hand you tendencies, predispositions, temperaments. Some are benign—your love for puzzles, your knack for cooking. Others? They weigh heavier.
The Shackles of Temperament
Maybe you inherited more than a temper. Maybe it’s a restlessness you can’t quite shake or a predisposition toward sadness that feels almost like a family tradition. These are the chains that are hardest to break because they don’t announce themselves loudly; they seep in, generation after generation, like water finding every crack.
Few people have the will—or even the awareness—to escape these temperamental shackles. It takes a rare kind of introspection to pause and say, “This isn’t me. It’s them, showing up in me.” And even then, knowing doesn’t always mean escaping.
Breaking these patterns requires an almost herculean effort. Therapy, self-awareness, prayer, sheer determination—it’s a long, uphill battle. But for those who fight it, the freedom is unparalleled.
The Injustice of the Physical
Of course, some things aren’t temperamental at all. They’re visible. Palpable. Permanent.
You see it in the young boy who knows he’s going to be short because his dad and his dad’s dad never hit 5'6". Or in the girl who brushes her hair with a tinge of dread, already noticing the thinning that her mother and grandmother couldn’t escape.
It feels unfair, doesn’t it? That something so fundamental, so out of our control, can shape not just how we see ourselves, but how the world sees us. And yet, we carry it. Some with grace. Others with resentment. But always with the knowledge that it’s there, woven into our very being.
Escaping the Inevitable
Here’s the thing about genes: they’re powerful, but they’re not destiny. Not entirely.
Yes, you might have inherited your father’s tendency to brood or your mother’s quick temper, but you also inherited their resilience, their ability to adapt, their strength. You’re not just a copy-paste of their flaws. You’re a remix, a new edition.
And yes, you might be fighting against a bald future or a frame that never quite reaches what you hoped it would. But there’s freedom in realising that worth isn’t tied to perfection. That embracing what you’ve been given—even the hard parts—can be its own kind of rebellion.
A Legacy to Leave
One day, someone might look at you the way you look at your parents now. Maybe it’ll be a child. Maybe a niece or nephew. Maybe just someone who sees you as a role model.
What will they see?
Will they see someone who was shackled by what they inherited, or someone who decided to break free? Will they see someone bitter about what couldn’t be changed, or someone who made peace with it?
Genes can be cruel, yes. But they don’t have to define you. You are more than your DNA. You are the choices you make, the patterns you break, the legacy you leave behind.
And that? That’s entirely up to you.